Brewed Boredom

When boredom brews in the cask of your mind, you reach a higher state of existence, a state where you exist half and half you don't, where you are, but you still are not, and thus are one with the world at large.

My nirvana occurred, when I watched the supposedly comic movie 'De Dana Dana' in a cinema hall. The experience was divine, not because the movie was delightful. But, it was so mind numbingly boring, that I ended up as a grinning fool for the rest of the day. 

On that fateful day, I took my father to watch the movie, after some critic on some channel said and I quote "The movie will make you laugh all the way through".

We sat there watching. Fifteen minutes  into the movie, trying hard not to lose interest. Thirty minutes into the movie, I was frowning at the screen.One hour into the movie, I was trying hard not to pull out my beautiful, long  mane grown with utmost care. And finally arrived the much awaited interval.

 I was happy to just get out of the cinema hall. We somehow unfortunately decided against going back home; probably because our reasoning abilities had gone to a mighty toss by then. I bought a couple of  packets of chips and some drinks, with the forethought that at least they would keep me entertained for the next half of the movie. But I couldn't help but munch them off  wildly, due to the extreme restlesness arising out  of the ennui. And thus I sat there, bereft of  all my sources of joy, within 15 minutes of the interval. Now left with nothing to do, I sat there dreading every moment that passed by me so very slowly, like a snail with its bum going 'Waka waka' to Shakira's song.      

And then came that magical moment, when the boredom had brewed enough. It kicked the butt of my brain, making it so light headed, that I was grinning like an idiot for no reason at all. I laughed at the silly jokes of the movie; at the man beside me, who had been laughing out loud all through, almost snorting and guffawing. I was just amused to see this grown up man, laughing his butt off, and falling off his seat during the process, at the apparent jokes of the movie. My facial muscles started to hurt  from all the grinning that lasted for the rest of the day. I had turned into a grinning,enlightened fool!

Recipe for joy, brew that boredom. If you don't have the patience for the elaborate process of brewing ennui, just go grab that mug of  already brewed beer!

An insect's life

There was an insect. It couldn't move these days. It was growing larger and larger. Its outer crust was hardening by the day. Its mandibles grew further apart. It couldn't majestically snap them together anymore. Its sticky saliva dripped from its mouth. Thus, it lay there in the pool of its own making.

There was an another insect. It had a nose like that of a human, which was strange for an insect to have and hence was its prized possession. But it did not have wings. And noses come with oil glands, and this particular nose came with a lot of them that were overtly active. It wiped and wiped. But the oil just wouldn't go . It dripped onto the ground below. The insect with its nose stuck high up in the air, tried to move, but it slipped, time and again.

There was again an insect. It stood there, in a corner of the meeting hall, where the other assembled insects talked about things that made no sense to it. It just stood there, flapping its wings and blinking it eyes. It was bound, they said, by duty.

There was an another insect in another part of the world. Its wings were born-fragile. It would flap them, one time, two time......a hundred time, and then they would fall off. They would grow back nevertheless in time. But they never were strong enough.

There was a light. The source unknown. The insects wanted to reach it. Nobody came back to tell about the glories of the light. Yet they all wanted to be there.

My reasons for a raise

The appraisal season is here. I think it is just the right time to put down my reasons for needing a raise, apart from the very obvious reason that I have done an excellent job at work. They are very valid and you will agree so, once you are done reading this post. I am sure to garner some well-deserved sympathies too.

It is not out of greed or the ever increasing wants and desires, which we mortals so susceptible to, that I ask for a raise! No! The reasons are quite different indeed.

I am afflicted with the 'I lose things' syndrome. Yes I do. And 'I conk things' syndrome  too. Things start malfunctioning or stop working altogether, when they come within the radius of my aura.

I have lost a mobile phone in the past month. I have lost many silver earrings. Some I have smashed, unknowingly of course. And many more nosepins. And silver is not cheap, is it?.

 The sound card of my laptop is not working. They say I will have to replace the mother board.

I just spent a whooping sum on getting new lenses for my spectacles, which I had bought for a whoopwhooping sum of money not so very long ago. The lenses are costly too these days; worth more than silver I must say! The old lenses just got scratches all over themselves overnight. I positively could not have done anything to them at night while I was fast asleep.

And I have lost four mobile pouches in the span of a week. All of them, I swear by it, just disappeared into thin air.

 I have to get my watch repaired. Yes the poor thing was a casualty of my man-handling, I admit. But I was just trying to set time.

 I have some problems with my new mobile(Yes, already!).

My footwear don't like my feet or may be it is the other way around. But they just don't last.

Earphones, I buy them like a million a year.

And did I tell you about "I forget to take the ticket-change" syndrome. It is not like a buck or two that I forget to ask back for, but it is in the range of a hundred or so.

And yes, my IPod is missing and even the hands-free of my cell. Hoping they will just come and sit on my bed coyly, as they sometimes do. These "things" have a life of their own, I tell you.

And have lost many a pen-drives of all sizes, 2GB, 4GB, et. al. I have stopped buying them. I have come up with a law of my own correlating the portability of an article with the probability of losing it. "The portability of an article, is VERY directly proportionate to the probability of losing it". The degree of VERINESS depends upon your predisposition to lose things.

Yes, there you go. My reasons for a "sustainable" raise.